Mini Me looked both ways before crossing the street. Mary Ellen was still back in her apartment and Mini Me felt a touch of remorse at leaving her without a note. She knew that Mary Ellen was unhappy, because she'd lost her job.

Mini Me wiggled a little bit, bouncing as she waddled down the street. Mary Ellen would miss her, but she was sure to be forgiven anything if her plan succeeded.

Mini Me reached the Greyhound station in almost no time, her urgency lending her speed. She'd left the hamster ball behind, even though it was much more comfortable. Running flat out was the best solution.

Her exertion was worth it when she made it to the bus station just as the bus leaving for San Francisco.

Hopping onto the bus, she yawned, unaware that the sharp and pointy teeth exposed by the Hamster!Yawn were the real reason why the scroungy looking people in the prime seats hastily vacated them. Mini Me didn't care. She didn't have to sit by the toilets and that was enough for her.

Settling in, she opened her reading material. Young Miss, Teen Vogue, the NSYNC Yearbook, all were appropriate preparatory material for Mini Me's mission. She was heading out to find Mary Ellen's crush, one... uh, Mini Me looked at the pictures. She rolled her little hamster eyes. She didn't quite know why Mary Ellen was obsessed with these guys.

But Lance Bass was the one that was on the computer the most, and Mini Me was positive that Mary Ellen had spent time on the phone with Jodi squeeing about "Let Lance sing, dammit!"

So, Lance it would be, unless Mini Me was successful and captured all of the members of NSYNC to come and visit her Mary Ellen.

Frankly, Mini Me thought Stuart Little was much more attractive, but these humans had no taste.

Tsking, she settled down to learn all about her prey.

Too many hours later, Mini Me staggered off of the bus, her tiny furry head awash with useless factoids about NSYNC.She decided to abandon the futile task of remembering Joey's favourite color or the traits that JC looked for the most in a girlfriend.

She was going to play it straight out. After all, she didn't particularly care whether these guys liked her or not. She was on a mission for her Mary Ellen. Sitting down, she pawed a chunk of green pepper out of her cheek, holding it in her paws and munching contemplatively. Where to start, where to start!

Mini Me knew that the Puppies were in San Francisco. They weren't touring at the moment, as they had a few days off. She hoped that she could use her might hamster powers to persuade them to go and visit Mary Ellen.

She waddled down the street, looking for their hotel. Taking advantage of her smaller size, she wove in and out of the bunch of screaming teenies.

She scooted right into the doorway, dodging feet and scampering onto the elevator. She'd look for the boys once she made it onto their floor.

Mini Me listened, using her powerful audio powers. She knew what NSYNC sounded like, from Mary Ellen's endless repetition of various cds and video tapes.

Listening, she soon heard the familiar distinctive rumble of Lance's voice and Justin who was obviously agitated about something. Mini Me raised a hamster eyebrow and wondered what exactly a ghetto bitch was. Dismissing her linguistic limitations with a wave of the paw, she stopped the elevator and hopped out.

She thought quickly and carefully, deciding that Joey would be the easiest to charm. She didn't want to waste her Action Hamster powers if she didn't have to. Nodding decisively, she headed out to find Joey.

She waddled down the hall, pinpointing the room accurately. She waited outside the door, lurking and hoping. Her whiskers trembled, as she waited. She wasn't nervous on her own account. She just knew that Mary Ellen adored these guys, and she hoped that her escape would be mitigated if she brought the guys with her. She sighed and crossed her claws.

Too soon for Mini Me's frazzled nerves, the door opened. Luck was with her! Joey stepped out in the hall, calling back something about taking a shower and how if they were bored, they should think of something to do, rather than sitting around bitching. Mini Me hopped onto Joey's foot, hoping that he wasn't one of those people who were senselessly prejudiced against rodents.

She grinned as he looked down and his face lit up. He scooped her up and nuzzled her head, and Mini Me swooned. Mary Ellen could babble about Lance's voice and Jodi could squee over JC and his cheekbones all that she wanted, but Joey was her man.

She used her special Action Hamster telepathy and Joey was opening the door, and carrying Mini Me inside the room, which turned out to be Lance's.

Mini Me was faced with NSYNC en mass and thanked her lucky hamster stars that she had studied up on them. She didn't often talk outside of speaking with Mary Ellen, but this was a special occasion. She stood up to address the room. Then Joey ran a soft and petting finger down her backbone, she looked up and saw his eyes all crinkled up in admiration of her cuteness and Mini Me the Action Hamster toppled over in a dead faint.

She came to, still cupped in Joey's palm, four sets of worried eyes looking at her. She snarled at the fifth person, Justin as she recalled, who was sprawled out on the bed talking to someone he was calling Brit. Dismissing him, as she remembered that he was Mary Ellen's least favourite, she opened her mouth and cleared her throat.

She met first Chris's eyes, then JC's eyes, then finally Lance's. She realized at that moment why it was that Mary Ellen squeed over him. Those clear green eyes were the color of the yummiest alfalfa cubes, and she shook her head as she realized that she was in danger of becoming a teenie.

Picturing Stuart in her head and reminding herself that these humans would not be at all good to mate with, she proceeded on with her explanation. She told them how her human was upset and that she loved to watch their videos and listen to their cd's. She assured them that Mary Ellen would by no means jump on them or hurt them.

Her explanations were cut short when Chris demanded to hold her and Lance extended a tentative arm. There was a small scuffle, but Mini Me was quite happy that Joey won. Looking up at him with adoring eyes, she continued. She asked if they would come with her back to Pittsburgh, just for a few hours just to cheer up Mary Ellen. Pausing, she considered her request. As a post script, she added somewhat confusedly that Mary Ellen had expressed a desire to watch Lance do something called jerking off, and that she'd undoubtedly be more than happy if they were to kiss repeatedly in front of her. She was shocked by the explosive snorts that met what she had considered a simple explanation.

She was even more shocked when Justin sat up, holding his hand over the phone and demanding why exactly this human of hers didn't want to watch him jerk off!

Mini Me raised a dismissive paw, informing him that he wasn't even necessarily invited. She punctuated that by rolling on her back and waving her paws encouragingly at Joey, so that he would pet her furry white belly.

She revelled in Joey's petting, casting diminutive come hither glances toward Lance. They were rewarded when Lance reached a tentative hand out toward her tummy. Purring with hamster glee, she blinked at Joey, and hoped that she was cute enough to work this. She kinda wanted them to do it without her Action Hamster powers.

Chris was the first to cave. Mini Me had figured that he'd be up for a weird adventure after all the stuff she'd read about him. She watched in glee and triumph as they all sorta looked at each other and shrugged. Joey handed her over to Lance as he reached for his cell phone to make flight arrangements. Mini Me watched him closely, sure that he was her favourite for all time.

The hour in the hotel room passed quicker than she could remember any time passing ever before, even when she ran on her hamster wheel. Lance had informed her in that lovely low voice, while he held her and stroked her gently, that he wouldn't be jerking off for Mary Ellen to watch. He'd smiled a little, though, and said maybe he could talk Joey into kissing him.

Mini Me hopped down after that promise and waddled over to JC. She wasn't feeling any love from him and she was gonna correct that right then and there.

Climbing up his pantleg, she sat in JC's hand and patted him with her hamster paw. His eyes cleared, and he smiled. He leaned in and explained that he'd been writing a song specifically about hamsters in his head. His long slender fingers tickled her ears, and Mini Me was in love all over again.

Too soon, they were in the limousine heading for the airport. Mini Me looked forward to the flight, and hoped that Joey could be convinced to feed her a tasty peanut or two.

Mini Me was pleased when the plane touched down. She'd gotten her peanuts, one for each cheek, but she was getting tired, and she missed Mary Ellen.

She directed the guys to the area where the cabs left and whispered the directions to Joey. She snuggled against his cheek and halfheartedly wished that she didn't love Mary Ellen so much. She could get used to this kinda treatment.

The cab ride was mercifully short. Soon they were in the lobby of Mary Ellen's building. Producing the spare key which she'd tucked into the bottom of her right cheek pouch, she spit it into Joey's hand.

He looked a little disconcerted, but wiped it off and unlocked the door. Mini Me noticed that they all looked a little concerned, and she reassured them about her human's sanity. Nodding, they all agreed that if she warranted this kind of expedition from her loyal hamster, she must not be too bad.

Soon, they were all standing in the hall outside of Mary Ellen's apartment, standing back and each waiting for each other to knock. Mini Me leaned in from Joey's shoulder and told Lance to knock. She informed him that he was Mary Ellen's favourite.

Lance sort of gulped and knocked. A crabby voice announced that she was coming, and the door was flung open.

They were amused to note that Mary Ellen was older than they'd expected. Holding their breath, they waited for the piercing squeals and fainting, only to be shocked when Mary Ellen was primarily concerned with Mini Me initially, scooping her off of Joey's shoulder and kissing the top of her furry little head.

Only after she'd scolded Mini Me for running away and making her even more worried, did Mary Ellen notice the guys grouped in the hallway. An eyebrow flew into the air, and Mini Me noticed that Mary Ellen had become fairly excited. She smiled in happiness as Mary Ellen beckoned them in.

Lance leaned in and whispered a promise of kissing Joey and laughed when Mary Ellen blushed and scolded Mini Me.

Mini Me laughed a small hamster chuckle when she realized that Mary Ellen was kinda hoping for that kiss. She hopped down from her hand and scurried over to Lance, who was sitting with a hand resting on Joey's leg.

Mary Ellen was busy digging beers up and telling the guys how much she enjoyed their singing and interviews. Mini Me was pleased that the guys had relaxed, and seemed to be enjoying the comfortable weirdness.

Chris was scuffling with JC, who looked concerned about when he would get to sleep again, while Joey and Lance talked with Mary Ellen and Mini Me was pleased with her surprise.

Only one thing was missing, and she took nipped Joey's hand just hard enough to get his attention. She gestured with her chin toward Lance, who was smiling and blushing as Mary Ellen told him how she listened for his voice in all the songs, and raved over the Napster'd version of the Lion Sleeps Tonight.

Joey took the hint and interrupted Lance in the middle of his sentence, leaning in to quickly and thoroughly kiss Lance.

Mini Me snickered as Mary Ellen sank to the floor, watching happily. Chris and JC just turned toward their two kissing bandmates and rolled their eyes, patting Mary Ellen on the shoulder.

Mini Me jumped up to Joey's hand, angling for a little petting, which she received almost immediately from both Joey and Lance. Enjoying the attention, she savoured the petting for a few minutes, before going over to JC and Chris for goodbye pets.

Satisfied with her accomplishment, Mini Me hopped back into her cage, waving a paw goodnight, snuggling down into the bedding in her timberblock and falling asleep listening to Mary Ellen laughing happily.

~end~