Hide and Seek
Shoot part one
by Pet

It started when they were really young. The talent show and audition circuit was pretty small in Tampa/Orlando, and Justin saw Nick quite a bit. He was taller than Justin, a year older almost, and quiet as a mouse when he wasn't singing. Justin thought that was probably because of his mom. Justin was afraid of Mrs. Carter. Eveyone was afraid of Mrs. Carter, after she went crazy and screamed at Nick and slapped him backstage after he'd slipped and fallen during a dance routine. Nick just stood there and took it, pale and tense, and Justin remembered feeling bad for him. It wasn't like HIS mom didn't yell...she did, especially when he got shy and wouldn't talk to the promoters, but she always did it in the car on the way home, not right there in front of everyone.

Since they were both singing dancing blond boys, they were up against each other in the competitions a lot. They didn't talk, though they watched each other closely, and their moms watched each other even closer. Justin sometimes messed around with some of the other kids while he was waiting his turn or waiting to hear, trading baseball cards or playing video games or whatever, but never Nick. Nick always sat quietly in the all-the-same cold waiting rooms, over by the nervous mothers, reading a book or drawing, until it was his time to go. It was kind of fascinating to Justin, actually. Nick was this big mystery. He couldn't dance as well as Justin, but his voice was better, and he was prettier. Or so Justin's mom said, when he'd lost the part in some movie to Nick, and she was really mad. He found himself watching Nick a lot. Nick was pretty.

And then Justin got a part in the Mickey Mouse Club. His mom was so happy she decided to throw a party. He remembered that time really clearly...his mom hung up the phone, grabbed him in this huge hug and kissed him over and over and told him he was finally going to make it, he was going to help the family, and she'd always known they'd be able to do it. She let him eat ice cream for dinner that night, and started planning the party the next morning. Justin had been to a few of those parties before, though never one for himself...the moms all pretended to like each other, and said nice things about whoever was celebrating, but they were all really mean about it later, and his mom had even cried once after Jim's party, and asked Justin why he couldn't be more like that. Justin had never known what to say at that kind of party, though it was always cool to get to hang out with the other kids. The non-circuit friends he had didn't really understand. Anything.

His own party was pretty much the same as all the others had been. His mom set up tables in their small backyard, and had punch and little sandwiches for the grownups, and pizza for the kids. All the kids from MMC had been invited, but only a couple showed up. Mostly it was the same group he saw all the time at auditions. And the Carters came, which was strange, because Mrs. Carter never came to these parties.

He got to stand at the door with his mom as people came, and get lots of kisses from the women and handshakes from the kids, because they were all being professional, even though Evan forgot and hopped up and down and gave him a big hug. Justin hugged him back hard, and forgot for a minute that he was on stage.

Once everyone was there, his mom let him go join the game of hide and seek that was already ranging all over the house. He ran into his bedroom, but there was someone already under his bed. He thundered down the stairs and through the living room into kitchen, and got shooed out by his mom, who shouted "No running in the house!" even though he wasn't slowing down and she knew it. He swung around a corner, down the one step into the den, and dove behind the couch.

And landed on a very startled Nick Carter.

"Oh, Nick, sorry-"

"HERE I COME, READY OR NOT!" Was that Keri? She was always so loud. He hunched back behind the couch again, pressed up against Nick, who was looking bewildered.

"Sorry, I know this is your spot, man, but I hate being it!" He was almost giggling, still panting.

"My spot?" Nick's voice was soft.

"Aren't you playing?" He wasn't paying attention to the sounds of someone screeching, getting caught upstairs. Nick's eyes were very blue, and his hair was falling over his forehead, and he was long and warm against Justin's side. He shook his head.

"No."

"What are you doing behind the couch then?" He was genuinely curious.

"I don't know. Drawing." He showed off his sketch pad, waved it around a little, looked uncomfortable.

Justin realized that this was the first time he'd ever talked to Nick.

"Can I see?"

Nick shook his head, frantically.

"No, no, I'm just, you know, it's what I do sometimes when I'm bored..."

"Hey!" Justin elbowed him. "You sayin' my party's boring, Nick Carter?"

"OH! No, I mean..." He was blushing. Justin laughed.

"You've gotta come play with us. It's fun!"

"I, I don't know. I don't really know the other kids..."

"That's because you never talk to us! Come on. Have some fun!"

"I don't know. My mom says..." He trailed off, ducked his head.

"Oh. Mom stuff, huh?" Justin nodded wisely. He knew about moms.

"Yeah, I guess."

"Well, she let you come today, right? So it must be cool."

"I think we're here because I'm trying out for the Mouse Club next week." Nick sounded awfully practical about that, Justin thought.

"Oh, really? Hey, that's so cool! We could be on the show together! It would be a total blast!" Justin bounced. "Wouldn't that be cool?"

Nick smiled at him. "Yeah. I guess it would."

"Nick!" Mrs. Carter sounded a little upset. Nick tensed like he'd had a shock. Not even thinking, Justin reached over and grabbed his hand. It was wierd, Nick was already a teenager, thirteen, and he was only twelve, but he felt like he was bigger and stronger and it was his job to make everything ok.

"Don't go," he whispered. "Stay here with me." Nick squeezed his hand right back.

"I've got to. I've got to get to practice."

"NICK!" Now she sounded irritated.

"Bye, Justin." And Nick smiled at him again.

"Bye, Nick." He felt a little sad. He couldn't make it ok, after all.

Nick climbed out from behind the couch, his sketchpad in hand. "Here I am, mom."

"Where were you? Nick, I've TOLD you not to go wandering off like that, and what is that all over your shirt? You can't go to your voice lesson like that, you know Mr. Shoenburg sets up auditions sometimes, and you have to look your best. Why don't you THINK?"

"I was talking to Justin about the Mickey Mouse Club, mom...he said the audition was pretty easy..."

"Oh." She sounded mollified. Justin was impressed. Now that was slick. "Well, come on. We still have to get home and get you a new shirt." Justin heard her voice fade as they moved to the door, and he wrapped his arms around his legs, resting his chin on his knees.

***

Nick tanked in his MMC audition, and Justin winced when he heard. He kicked at the couch for a good twenty minutes, too, since he really DID think it would have been cool to have been on the same show. Especially since he wasn't going to be going out on auditions any more, since he had a real job now, and he wouldn't get to see Nick at all.

Working at the Mouse Club was great, though. He had a tutor, and the other actors were so cool, a lot of fun, and his mom didn't look so worried all the time, the way she had since his dad had left. And there was a really pretty girl on the cast named Britney. She made his stomach feel funny, the same way Nick had, and when he finally kissed her in the makeup trailer, she giggled and wiped her mouth and punched him in the arm and let him do it again.

***

He called Nick after he heard about the Backstreet Boys, because it just sounded so cool.

"Nick!"

"Um, hello?"

"Nick, it's Justin. Justin Timberlake. Remember me? Auditions? Couch?"

"OH! Hey, Justin!" Nick sounded really excited to hear from him, and Justin settled back onto his bed with a happy little bounce.

"Hey! I heard about that group! Wow, you guys are signed and everything? And you're gonna be playing around here? That is SO wicked, yo!"

"Thanks, yeah, my mom's really happy about it. We're gonna record a couple of singles, and go to Germany."

"Why Germany? Man, that's kinda far."

He could almost hear Nick shrug. "I don't know. This guy Lou, he says it's what we're supposed to do."

"Whatever, I guess. Are the other guys cool?"

"Yeah, they sing great, and they're all a lot older, except this one guy AJ, I knew him before from talent shows and stuff, and he's, like, crazy! Seriously!" Nick laughed. Justin liked the sound. "He's only sixteen, and he's already got three tattoos. It's so cool, Justin. And we're singing and dancing all the time, we're rehearsing like eight hours a day."

"WHOA! That's great! What about school?"

"I don't know, Lou hired some tutor but I don't really have time."

"Dude, doesn't your mom care?"

"No, Lou told her I could catch up once we get the songs recorded, so she thinks it's ok. She really loves Lou, man."

"Hey, like loves loves?"

"No, man! Gross! You gotta see this Lou guy to understand, but GROSS!"

Justin laughed. "So, no more auditions for you, huh? Rock on!"

"Thank GOD." Nick sounded fervent, like he meant it.

"You didn't like that at all, did you."

"Nah, I hated it. Couldn't you tell?"

"Nope. You never talked to me. And then I finally got you to speak, and you're going to GERMANY, and that ain't fair, because I wanted to hang out!" Justin wailed.

"You wanted to hang out with me?"

"Dork. Who am I talking to here?"

"Why?"

"I don't know. You're cool, you know?"

"Yeah?" Nick sounded so hopeful.

"Yeah, dude! I always thought you were wicked cool. I mean, check it out, you're gonna be like this huge popstar now, and I'm just some kid with ears on, and you're gonna have to promise to remember me when you're all famous!"

"You're kind of hard to forget, Justin." Nick was smiling, Justin could tell.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Four hours later, when he hung up the phone, Justin realized that he hadn't done any of his homework, or studied his lines for the next morning's shoot. He got in trouble, but figured it was worth it, because Nick was shy and sweet, and laughed at his jokes, and was finally talking to him for real. And he called Nick back the next afternoon, and the afternoon after that, until Nick's voice was as familiar in his ears as his own. And then Nick left for Germany, and Justin couldn't reach him any more. He'd never admit it to anyone, but he pulled his pillow over his head and cried a little, after they said goodbye.

***

Still, though, if it weren't for Mrs. Carter, he would have lost track of Nick over the next year or so. He was busy with MMC and school, and Nick was touring Europe and getting pretty famous. But Mrs. Carter had two other kids on the circuit, now, and she'd kind of gotten friendly with Justin's mom, so they got updates on Nick every once in a while. He was in Germany. He'd grown six inches. SIX! Justin's mind boggled at that. The group was getting big. Nick was too, apparently. Justin thought he probably looked pretty amazing.

The first time he heard a Backstreet Boys songs on the radio in Orlando, he jumped up and down and howled, and got smacked in the head by JC, who really didn't have any business smacking anyone else for being a spaz. And he wanted to call Nick, so bad, but he didn't know how to get ahold of him any more.

[end]

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