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EXPECTED
Ephram had been expecting Colin all day, all week it felt like, so when he opened the door he was primed. He had his apology held on the tip of his tongue, with a few choice insults a little further back, and somewhere in his throat lurked the weird desire to drag Colin up to his room and hide him in a drawer until the surgery was over.
Which made, like, no sense, because as far as Ephram knew the patient really needed to be present for brain surgery. But it was there nonetheless, and more than a little compelling, and as a precaution Ephram tucked his free hand safely into his pocket before he opened the door and said, "I've been expecting you."
"Hi," said Bright.
Ephram blinked. He wasn't expecting Bright. "Can I help you?"
Bright shifted, looking over his shoulder, and then over Ephram's. "You got a minute?"
"You've already inconvenienced me on a daily basis since I moved here." Ephram stepped down onto the driveway, pulling his hand back out of his pocket again. He might need it. You never knew with Bright. "What harm can one more minute do?"
"Right, right," said Bright, obviously not listening. "Listen, if Colin dies, I'm going to blame you."
Ephram, who was busy being annoyed that he'd wasted yet another perfectly good sarcastic remark on Bright-who-wasn't, took a moment to let that sink in. "Excuse me?"
"Your dad's doing the surgery," said Bright, as if that explained everything.
"Yes." Ephram looked hard at Bright. "Bright, are you ok? And by that I do mean are you on drugs?"
Bright gave him a weird look. "I'm not from New York."
"No," said Ephram, "but you make about as much sense as the average native."
Bright made a frustrated noise and ran his hands through his hair. "Would you stop talking crap for one minute and listen? This is important!"
Ephram opened his mouth, and then shut it again. "Fine."
"Look," said Bright. "I'm not saying it's right. I'm just saying it's what will happen."
Ephram pinched the bridge of his nose. "Go on."
"Colin thinks you're his best friend. No, he does," he said, cutting off Ephram's protests, "and if he dies he's not ever going to remember that you aren't. That I am. Was. Before."
"Before you got him drunk, or before you crashed the truck?"
"You see? This is what I'm talking about! He thinks he likes you. He thinks you're cool." Bright pointed at Ephram's chest. "He doesn't remember that he would never even have given you the time of day. Before."
"Well, it isn't before," said Ephram. He'd been lying about the inconvenience part before, but even his sad existence had to have something more interesting to offer than standing in front of his house being yelled at by Bright Abbott. "It's after. Now, if that's all you came over to say-"
"He's going to die!" Bright burst out suddenly, taking a furious step forwards. Ephram fought the urge to back up against the porch. "He's going to die without ever remembering that I-"
"That you what?" said Ephram into the silence and Bright's flushed, open face.
Bright's jaw worked for a minute. When he spoke again his voice was quiet. "Nothing."
Ephram watched him trudge back towards the street and thought maybe he wasn't the only one with strange ideas about Colin and drawers.
***
Ephram stared at the ground between his sneakers. When he'd agreed to come and support his dad during the surgery, he hadn't really figured on how much sitting around and watching Amy hurt he was going to have to do.
Or how hard he'd have to bite his tongue whenever she said; "I feel like you really know how I feel, Ephram. Do you? Do you know how I feel?"
Ephram had excused himself after the fifteenth mumbled response and awkward pat on the shoulder. Because he didn't know. Amy loved Colin and Colin knew she did, and he loved her back and they were happy.
Ephram didn't know how any of that felt.
Colin had turned up yesterday, in the end, and all Ephram's rehearsed lines had disappeared the moment he opened the door.
"I know how you feel," Colin had said, looking anywhere but him and then straight into his eyes, and Ephram could feel the words curling up and dying in his mouth.
Because Colin didn't. And maybe he wouldn't, now, ever.
The only person who seemed to have any clue about how Ephram was feeling was Bright, and wasn't that just a perfect cosmic joke. Ephram knew all about the universe's ironic sense of karma. He read comics.
A shadow fell over his feet, and he looked up squinting into the light, expecting Amy or maybe his dad.
"Hi," said Bright.
Ephram blinked. He wasn't expecting Bright. "Uh, hi."
Bright stood for a minute, then gestured awkwardly at the step Ephram was sitting on. "Um."
Ephram looked down, and then at Bright again. "Oh," he said, scooting over to make room. "Sure."
"Thanks." Bright lowered himself onto the step, resting his elbows on his knees and looking at the ground.
Ephram watched him for a minute, then returned his own attentions to the ground, too. He was just wondering if the ants marching along in a thin line had a king or a secret lair under the parking lot, when Bright said,
"I'm his best friend."
Ephram looked at him sideways. "Wow. You really aren't as dumb as you look. I thought that was a myth."
Bright punched him in the arm. "Shut up and listen. He told me I'm his best friend. No matter what."
"Uh huh." Ephram nodded thoughtfully. "So�"
"So now you can dye your hair whatever dumb color you like, free from the worry that I may appear behind you at any given moment and rip your head from your body."
Ephram felt the smile spreading across his face before he even knew he was laughing. "The jock jokes. News at ten."
"Hey," said Bright. "I have layers."
Ephram grinned, and looked back down at his knees. "Who knew?"
***
He wouldn't come into the hospital, choosing instead to sit on the step with Ephram.
"I'm�he�this is Amy's thing," he said, making a vague gesture with his hand. "Colin, I mean."
Ephram nodded, and said he knew how Bright felt.
They sat in silence until Ephram's butt was so numb he'd have bet good money on its complete and total disappearance.
"Colin would have liked you," said Bright when he stood up to leave. "If he'd given you a chance, I mean. Before."
"It's not before," said Ephram, hoping his ears weren't turning pink. "It's-"
"After, I know. And I know he likes you now, and everything." Bright nodded. "But still."
"Well." Ephram cleared his throat. "Thanks."
Bright nodded again, and Ephram watched him wander slowly back towards the street, and thought that he hadn't expected to know how Bright felt.
But he did.
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